I don’t generally use this site for tasteless gossip, but hey, it’s Friday, it’s freezing cold, and I have a little time on my hands right now.
As I was perusing Perez Hilton, reading yet another ridiculous post about Kim Kardashian’s well oiled rear end, I noticed something suspicious. How could the entire media gossip world have missed this one?
Kim is not, in fact naked. I repeat, she is NOT actually naked! While everyone is posting stories on what type of oil was used to make her butt so shiny ( it’s been attributed to a local French baby oil by her makeup artist, and to a hair oil from her very own haircare line by Mrs. West herself,) I am here to tell you differently. She is wearing a skin toned, latex suit! Uh-huh honey ( see what I did there with the Kanye reference?) This particular photo shows subtle lines around her upper body, which are clearly straps. Blow this photo up a little bit and see what I mean. A photo expert, who happens to live in this house, noted that the skin reflections are different on the presumed covered parts than on the actual skin. And when I blew it up in more dramatically in photoshop ( I really do need to get a life) you can see where she has been photoshopped down a size or two ( or three.)
She has been photographed recently wearing latex clothing from fetishwear designer Atsuko Kudo, In a recent comment to the Daily Mail, the designer remarked,”‘Latex fits so much to the body that to the naked eye it’s very difficult to tell if it’s a top and a skirt, or a dress.”. ( Or a bodysuit to make it look like you’re nude when you really aren’t?)
Kim’s skin-tight outfit appears to leave little room for underwear, and Simon admitted it generally looks better if the wearer does go sans pants.
Ah-ha! Another clue. Did Kudo design a special suit to smooth her skin, compress her a bit and make her look sleeker and slicker?
Take a look at this photo from Perez Hilton, and see what you think. The caption is referring to the oil, but I, dear readers, have found something different.
Look at the scoop under her arm, and the straps and scooped back. Those aren’t tan lines!
I should have been a detective…Mwahhahahahaha!
Break the internet Indigo Jones!
*We shall resume our more tasteful and useful stories on Monday!
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All The News Unfit To Print
September 2, 2015I certainly could do worse things than keep up with senseless gossip, like sleep with the nanny while married, fondle young children, get arrested while intoxicated, or simply pour myself into a sheer dress six sizes too small, wear a pound of makeup and strut around town acting like I’m all that and a bag of chips too! Yes, the celebs do interest me, but sometimes I just skim the article and read the comments. Let me be clear on this one; I never, ever comment.
The commenters are a slice of human life that I find mind boggling. They either type on smart phones and don’t read through it before pressing enter, or they are not the most literate bunch you will meet. Probably both. Most comments are riddled with typos, poor grammar, and misuse of words. They almost always mess up the “you’re and your” situation, and fight with one another like they are the Real Housewives of some trailor park community. They go back and forth as if they have all the time in the world to argue over the most inane things. They viciously attack other commenters, and the website they are on for posting such drivel. That is always the most amazing part. They take time out of their “busy” days to not only dish up parenting advice for Kim “Kartrashian” as they call her, or her mother PMK (Pimp Mama Kris), they also spend time telling Perez Hilton how much they hate him, his sexual orientation and his website, or insisting that websites stop printing articles about “these people”.
Radar Online itself is no better. It is likely written by a middle schooler with an attention deficit disorder. The grammar is horrendous, and the facts are often a little mixed up. Jennifer Aniston honeymooned in Bora Bora and Keeping Up With The Kardashians was filming in St. Barts, but they both are exotic beach locales starting with the letter B, so WTF, right? They write big lead ins such as “all the intimate details of blah, blah, blah, and then don’t actually have any details to share.
It is one thing to voyeristically enjoy a dishing the dirt a bit, and another to go online and publically attack strangers by sharing bigoted comments that nobody really wants to know about. I am facinated by what makes these people tick, and what their lives are like that prompts them to be so verbose and opinionated, as well as have the time on their hands to troll these sites all day.
Do you like celebrity gossip? Where do you draw the line?
Photo: Glasshouse Images
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Tags:celebrities, celebrity gossip, comments, gossip, Kardashions, Perez Hilton, Radar Online
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